15. London calling

Tanya rattled her fingernails against the glass of the phone box while she listened to the ring-tone. Anxiety nibbled in her belly. She was aware of the cause. It was not the aching anticipation of talking to her Nikolai; it was the little white lie she was going to tell him, about her "waitressing" job in London.

"Allo?" The voice was Russian, not Nikolai's.

"Who is that?" asked Tanya.

"This is Yuri. Who is that?"

"Hello, Yuri. Can I speak with Nikolai, please?"

"Aha! The famous Tanya! Where have you been? He is losing his mind."

"I am here now. Can you tell him?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"He is not home."

"Where is he?" asked Tanya.

"I don't know. Sunday mornings he waits by the phone and, last week, after work too but you did not call. Today he says he's lost his love and invites everyone to get drunk with him. They have gone on a bar crawl."

"But not you."

"I must not drink. It used to be problem..."

"Will you give him a message?" asked Tanya. "Tell him I love him and I miss him. Tell him I am fine and I will try to call again in a few days. And tell him not to worry, he is my life."

"So he must wait by the phone again?"

"Yes."

"Tanya, will you answer a question for me?"

"Ok."

"What do you do for Nikolai that makes him so crazy for you?"

"Excuse me! Mind your own business!" Tanya laughed. It felt good to hear and speak her own language again. "There is one more thing you can tell him." She hesitated, unsure whether to say it or not.

"Tell him what?" said Yuri. "That if he is in a bar when you next call, you will dump him for honest Yuri."

"Fool! That's you, not him." She paused again. "I am in London."

"What!"

"Tell him I am safe and well and working for our future."

"Fucking hell! Don't say anymore, he'll strangle me for information. Maybe you should speak to him directly about that."

"You're probably right," said Tanya. "Ok, tell him I sent a big kiss."

"With or without tongues?"

"With, of course. And not only on his mouth."

"Oh no! I can't say that!"

"Do you see why he loves me now?"

"I do! I do! Please dump him, Tanya, and marry me!"

"No chance. You're too ugly."

"Ouch! That hurts. What has your pretty boy been saying? You should know that I look like Brad Pitt....."

"I have seen photos, Yuri, of you and the others. None of you are as beautiful as my Nikolai. But I must get back to work. Bye for now."

She replaced the receiver and coins dropped into the change slot. She ignored them and stood with her hand resting on the phone, while thoughts of Nikolai swirled in her brain.

She didn't notice the maroon Jaguar glide to a halt at the road side but she was snapped back to reality by the opening door of the phone box. A rush of cold air smacked against her head. It was Liam.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he roared.

He didn't wait for an answer. Her arm was grabbed painfully, then she was pulled from the phone box and thrown into the back of the car. Lana was in the front passenger seat. Their eyes met in the rear view mirror.

"I had to talk to him," said Tanya. "He's worried."

"Is he better now?" Lana's voice was unemotional.

"He wasn't there."

"Waste of time then. If you'd waited a little longer, I would have let you make the call."

"You should have told me....."

Tanya was silenced by Liam opening the driver's door.

"A Berlin number," was all he said as he sat down.

At the flat, Lana went in first to escort Chocolate John off the premises, then Liam took Tanya straight through to the living room. He turned off the television and spoke harshly to William.

"Get Ben here! Now!"

While William tapped a number into his mobile, Liam dragged Tanya to the bedroom

"I thought we'd reached an understanding," he said, "but you had to go and fuck it up. That's the trouble with you people, you don't know when you're on to a good thing."

He held her wrists together with one hand and began pulling off his tie with the other.

"Liam, what are you....."

"Shut it!" he shouted and slapped her across the face. Tanya cried out, as much from shock as pain. He gripped her wrists tighter and stared into her eyes. "I said, shut up."

A burning sensation grew in her cheek and was not cooled by the tears flowing over it. She stood silently as he bound her wrists and she made no noise when he pushed her face down on the bed. Her dress was shoved up around her waist and she felt her panties stretch across her belly till the elastic broke. They were torn off, her legs were parted and she heard the sound of a zipper. Then he was on her.

His left fist was buried in the duvet inches from her eyes and she lost herself in the forest of hair on his forearm till he finished.

She didn't move when he stood up and she remained silent as he manhandled her across the bed. He positioned her on her back with her head on a pillow. "That's supposed to make me comfortable?" she wanted to say but didn't.

He opened the wardrobe and took out a metre-long metal chain, with clips at each end, which he looped between her tied wrists and secured to the headboard of the bed. Then he returned to the wardrobe and produced a leather gag, which he strapped over her mouth and buckled tightly round the back of her head. She watched his quiet, purposeful movements and did not resist. Then he left the room.

She wriggled her body to try and slide her dress under her buttocks but it stayed stubbornly rucked above her hips. Voices filtered through the wall, so she abandoned her struggle and, instead, attempted to hear some of the words. But they were too muffled. Minutes passed and nobody came into the bedroom.

Tanya's thoughts turned to Nikolai. She wondered what he was doing. He always complained about going away to work but she knew it wasn't so bad for him. He talked a lot about his adventures in Germany, about Yuri and his other friends there. But a bar crawl was out of character. He rarely drank to excess. Before the army took him, he rarely drank. Since returning from National Service, he suffered occasional black moods and a bottle was his only escape. A private bottle. She always knew when it was coming. His restless dreams would become more frequent, as would the night sweats, till he'd wake one morning a different man; silent and dark and brooding on secret torments. It was the only time she felt a gap between them; a gap she could not bridge. After drinking himself into oblivion, he would apologise and make amends in wonderful, loving ways but she would have preferred no gap at all. Now, she was the cause of extra distress for him and she could do nothing to ease it.

Lana was right. Nikolai would have warned her about the dangers she could face, and with that warning she would not have travelled alone. That was the reason for not calling him before leaving. She had come to London hoping for the best but prepared for the worst. The worst had happened and she had found she could live with it.

The doorbell interrupted her thoughts and she heard Lana invite a man into the flat. They went through to the living room and a few minutes later the bedroom door was opened by William.

"Hello, doll. May I come in?" he said. Tanya tried to preserve her modesty by raising one knee. "The boss says you've been playing silly buggers and we've got to teach you a lesson." Another man followed William into the room. He looked almost identical. But with less hair and more fat. "I'd like to introduce my brother, Benjamin."